


Wish You Were Here

by ExpressAndAdmirable



Series: The Heroes of Light [53]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Dungeons & Dragons - All Media Types, Final Fantasy I
Genre: Backstory, Gen, Suicidal Thoughts, Tiefling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 20:43:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13419276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExpressAndAdmirable/pseuds/ExpressAndAdmirable
Summary: Aviva's idle mind is a dark place sometimes. Contains: suicidal ideation/intrusive thoughts.





	Wish You Were Here

_But what if you did it?_

The thought came unbidden, intruding on her mind’s idle meanderings as she watched the water below her. It was not a violent thought, as sometimes they were, screaming and clawing at the windows of her darkest moments. Nor was it one of the sly, creeping whispers that waited at the edges of her consciousness like a low-hanging fog. It simply was.

_What if you just… did it?_

The morbidly logical part of her knew that at barely eight feet above the canal, this particular bridge could not possibly do the job. At most, the impact would sting, possibly bruise. Water from this height was no good for stopping a fall. Yet as she watched the cloudy grey of the sky reflected on the rippling surface, the thought unfolded: the water would not stop her, but perhaps it would embrace her.

It would not hurt. She had convinced herself of that long ago; whether or not it was actually true, she had finally been able to sleep through the night, no longer tormented by images of her father. It had been peaceful. He had not been afraid. He had simply closed his eyes and faded away, cold and weightless. It would be so easy to do the same.

_Mama._

She could no longer remember the details of her father’s face, nor the low, warm tones of his voice, but she knew exactly what her mother had looked like the day her world caved in. The image followed her like a shadow, burned into her memory with perfect clarity. Her mother tried so hard to be strong, to hide the jagged tear in her soul, but the sound of her keening echoed across the years.

There were those who had expected her mother to wither away, to simply lose the will to continue on without her husband. But she had a daughter. A little girl who needed her, too young to understand her own pain and grief. So they had clung to one another, intertwining, two broken hearts using their own ragged flesh to keep the other whole. They were inextricable, connected at the roots. One would not survive alone.

Aviva flicked the ash of her cigarette into the water below and pushed off from the stone railing, joining the flow of foot traffic as it crossed slowly over the bridge. She really ought to be getting home. Her mother would be missing her.

**Author's Note:**

> Title song by Pink Floyd (though I recommend the cover by Rasputina).
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr at @expressandadmirable for a proper table of contents for the Heroes campaign, commissioned character art, text-based roleplay snippets and more!


End file.
